I love yoga. Wait, I used to love yoga. At one point, when I was living in Mississauga I was practicing everyday in a sweaty bikram packed mat-to-mat with yuppies and yogis alike. I would come out of those classes glowing like a full moon, with the silliest smile on my face for no reason. If you have ever really pushed yourself in yoga, or any physical activity that really challenged you, you know what I am talking about. The post-yoga/run/swim high that envelops you with joy, calm and the sense that everything is in it's place. Ya, delicious. But the post yoga glow is something maybe even better than the post-run because of how much the shutting off of the mind is stress while practising...so you feel like you got some neurons back after the session--maybe a little reboot? Anyways, at some point in the passing of time I forgot all about the post-yoga-life-glow.
I think it was my move to Nova Scotia that made it harder to maintain a good practice. I found it impossible to find a studio that really challenged me in my town of 6,000 and although I was armed with the video of my favorite instructor (Ana Forrest, who I had the gift of practicing with at a workshop in Connecticut years ago) it just wasn't working. The video sounded good in theory but it wasn't anything like being in a class where you are guided, as well as adjusted by a skilled instructor. Just the tinniest pelvic shift or curvature of the spine can make a huge difference with regards to the integrity of a posture--and with the tight hips, and spinal issues that I have it's almost essential that I have someone there to help me get the most out of my practice. When left to my own yogic devices sometimes I find I strain myself, push myself too hard, or not hard enough.
As mentioned I couldn't find a studio in my town, so I was pretty excited when I heard that I would get the opportunity to do some practice in my theatre movement class. But (wahn wahn)the yoga I encountered in my classes was pretty basic as to ensure that those without much experience got something out of it. So I sort of, well, fell off the yoga train, not to mention the movement train. I danced like hell when I got out on the dance floor, and did some interpretive work and free flow in movement class but those sweet boogie sessions were few and far between.
So I essentially took a good 3-4 years off of any type of regular exercise or stretching program. I can't help but stretch out my spine hourly, but other than that I was basically a sloth. Hey, I don't have anything against sloths. They are a) fucking cute, not to mention fuzzy b) look extremely cosy in their little tree haunts and c) seem super comfortable. I think that is the issue with why I didn't move for a few years. I was getting comfy, settling in to swapping Provinces, not to mention battling a depression that seemed unending, but which in reality lifted after those first two years at school. When the cloud of malaise lifted...I was ready to be slightly uncomfortable, whether that meant being more social and risking many an awkward moment, or feeling like my legs were full of battery acid after a long run...I was ready to be challenged, and not covered by a duvet with a cup of tea. Although, I am often still found under a duvet with a cup of tea, but it's less of an escape and more of a pleasure now.
After breaking free from some bad habits (going to bed at 4am for a whiiiiile there-OK, OK I realize it's crazy, I realize that now--), not drinking or smoking, and focusing on myself, I began to gather some 'life is good' momentum and started hitting the gym with an friend. I remember my first session where I ran 20 minutes. Suprised that I could run at all and feeling the pride and sweat on my forehead I knew, instantly, then and there that this was something that was right at that moment. So I started going regularly instantly. That was back in early december. It's June now and I am still loving the exercise. Although, the gym is getting old. Thankfully summer is here though, so I am able to move this healthy hobby into nature's glory.
So if I am so happy with my running/strength training why am I bringing up yoga? Well it seems my tight hips and spinal issues that I was working on stretching through and strengthening back in the day have reared their painful heads and have taken me off the pavement indefinitely. I saw a trainer to see if she could put me back together again and get me out and running ASAP. But, being the skilled and studied professional that she is... she suggested a series of weight bearing exercised and... yoga.
For some reason though, I really wasn't feeling the yoga. I felt myself really resisting the idea of slowing down like that. Thinking--how am I going to get a good workout from this? And resisting the slow pace that I would have to adjust to. So for 2 weeks I just kind of, ignored her yoga suggestion. But today, I cracked. I yoga-cracked. I was exhausted, and a real workout just didn't seem possible. So I signed up for a yoga class after work. It was, well, it was OK. The repetitive sun salutations bored me and the endless downward dogs started to make my head feel a little wooshy, and my mind, it just wouldn't shut off. I hated all these challenges, but in a sense I loved them. Yoga is so much more than a workout for me. Shutting off my brain for an hour and a half seems impossible at this point. But maybe next time I can shut it off for larger chunks (let's get serious, if I can shut it off for over 1 minute next class it will be a success).
Although there were some low points to the class and I clock-watched (woops, I mean, I don't clockwatch in yoga) the most important thing I got from the class was my reconnection with my favorite posture. Which was my reminder of lovely today. The tree pose. Oh, the tree pose. Standing in this posture connects me to my love of nature, a feeling of strength and well, it's a a nice game of balancing.
Not only are tree such amazing living creatures providing us with clean air, they are such strong symbols. Big trunks, little trunks, trees with flowers, trees with needles, trees with scents, trees with little squirrels hopping on their bendy forgiving brances--they are, in my humble opinion some of the most beautiful pieces of collected matter on this planet. So, stand up, try out this pose and.. connect to the strength and of a wise old oak tree.
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